Leadership Tea
On Leadership Tea, we talk about what it takes to reach the executive level, and how to thrive when you get there. Powerful leaders share their journeys, insights, and triumphs in conversations with hosts Shelby Smith-Wilson and Belinda Jackson Farrier.
Join us every other Wednesday to be inspired by the unvarnished stories of amazing executives who know what it's like to be "the only" at the table and who have succeeded regardless. They have proven leadership experience in their respective fields, from international affairs to the private sector to academia, and want to help others create their own success stories.
Leadership Tea
Your Leadership Genius: Are You Born a Leader? | S3 EP7
What are some of the core qualities that differentiate exceptional leaders? And what strengths do you bring to your leadership role? From staying calm under pressure to leading with empathy, understanding your leadership genius is key to thriving at the executive level.
Belinda and Shelby discuss the idea of a leadership zone of genius, whether it's innate or developed through personal experiences. They discuss how early life experiences have impacted their leadership skills and identify their strengths as leaders.
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Hey everyone, welcome to the Leadership Tea podcast, where we talk about not only what it takes to reach the executive level, but how to thrive once you get there. I am Shelby Smith-Wilson. I am a senior government executive, a diplomat and an executive coach.
Speaker 2:Hey, and I'm Belinda Jackson-Farrier. I'm a former diplomat, a former tech executive and right now an entrepreneur and coach. Welcome to our show.
Speaker 1:Today we begin by drawing your attention to a challenge that we are sponsoring this month. It's called the Shoot your Shot Challenge. We mentioned it in our last episode and you will begin seeing more postings from us about the challenge, but ultimately, we want you to start thinking about what is it that you have been putting off that you need to just take off the shackles and shoot your shot, Whether it's a business proposal, whether it's, you know, perhaps a love interest that you have been considering and you've just been hesitant to say something to that individual. What is it that you have been holding back on where you need to just shoot your shot? So stay tuned for more information on that. We have uploaded a pledge form on our website, but you'll hear more from us on that real soon.
Speaker 2:Exactly. It's really exciting, and if you want to know more details about why we're so inspired to shoot your shot in this time, go back and listen to our last episode and you'll get more details there. Shelby, it's time to jump into today's topic. This is a topic that was inspired by a conversation that I had with my own business coach. In our conversation, on an issue that I was struggling with, he asked me what is your genius? I had to really think about that. I think in our context, my question to you and to our audience is what is your genius as a leader? And to our audience is what is your genius as a leader? What is it that differentiates you and how would you define that genius in your leadership style?
Speaker 1:I love that question, especially as we think about how to help people in moments of transition and in moments of turbulence and change. If I were to reflect on what my genius is, it's my ability to stay calm. I've actually had clients tell me that they enjoy talking to me because the R that I bring is calming. Sometimes they come to conversations and they're rattled by something you know that went sideways in a meeting or an interaction with their boss, or something is just off kilter prior to them talking to me and they usually compliment me on my manner and just kind of bringing them to center and giving them space to be silent if that's necessary, or the manner in which I take a really complicated issue and break it down in a way that's digestible and helpful, without minimizing the gravity of whatever it is that they're describing.
Speaker 1:I think my ability to be calm and steady I am definitely the person that you want around you. If the ship is sinking, If all hell is breaking loose, I don't lose my cool. That is just one of my superpowers. I have been known to interact with people, communicate with people in the same tone of voice that I'm using with you right now. I'm just very I'm very level-headed and able to differentiate between okay, these are the things that we need to do, but I can do it in a way that's calm, where I'm not losing control. I'm appreciative of the seriousness of, you know, the issues that might be confronting us, but I'm able to just bring people down and recognize that they will imitate my energy, and if my energy is flippant or hysterical, then that's just not going to serve anyone in a crisis situation. So, yeah, I would say calm.
Speaker 2:I would agree. I think you've definitely had some tests in your career where you had to rely on that right. Yeah, just a few, yeah just a few, just a few.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think for me I would say empathy, and I would say that what empathy allows me to do is to see an issue from someone else's perspective and, at times, to even help other people see an issue from the perspective of other stakeholders. What that allows at maybe a macro level is to be able to see all sides of an issue, to be able to negotiate through something, to be able to be a bridge builder. Through that, especially when you're working on complex issues that are an issue across teams or across parts of an organization, it can be a blessing and a curse. When you have empathy and you are seeing things from other people's perspective, you have to really stay clear on what your position and your mission is and what you need to get out of it and not bend too much.
Speaker 2:I also think, literally I can just read a room and it just really affects me. You walk in a room and if everybody's just angry, it just takes something out of me. Where everybody's distraught, it just it takes something out of me physically, like I'm tired. It hurts. So I have to really be cognizant about putting up boundaries, yeah, and staying really rooted in what I know is the mission Getting everybody coalesced around a point in a way that's not demeaning, doesn't diminish people and helps everyone find the center.
Speaker 1:Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah, I definitely say that I've seen the empathetic leader in you in the way that complete strangers feel comfortable talking with you. The vibe that you put out is very warm and welcoming and people feel comfortable in sharing whatever is on their heart or on their mind with you, even if it's someone that you've just met and someone that you haven't, even, you know, established a full relationship with. I've witnessed that and could see how it could be a double-edged sword, because people will assume that they can continue to dump on you. Oh, it's like well, belinda understands Belinda's empathetic Belinda's there Belinda is, you know she's always willing to listen, and so you can. There Belinda is, you know she's always willing to listen, and so you can run the risk of becoming a dumping ground for people to just lay all of their burdens on you without giving you some consideration and space for you to go through whatever it is that you may be going through if you're having a bad day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, definitely Definitely have that experience. Bad day yeah, no, definitely Definitely had that experience. Do you think that bringing your genius to the next level is something that is just natural you were born with, or is it something that you have practiced and trained for and really honed over the years?
Speaker 1:It's a great question and something I've been thinking about quite a bit as I look at blogs and different LinkedIn posts on whether leadership is can it be learned or is it something you're born with? You know, the diplomat in me is tempted to say it's both. I think there are people who are born with natural abilities to do certain things well, are born with natural abilities to do certain things well. It's just like if you think about sports and I know we use a lot of sports analogies in our episodes because you know we like sports I would argue that Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player ever. You're just not going to duplicate his level of talent, his level of discipline and commitment and knowledge of the game too.
Speaker 1:I do think that there are individuals who are born with specific talents that you just can't carbon copy Like.
Speaker 1:Even if you work very hard at the game, you know you're out on the basketball court and practicing on your own in between your team practices, or getting up early in the morning and taking your shots or running drills or whatever it is that you need to do to condition your body.
Speaker 1:You can do all of those things, but I do believe that there are certain individuals that are just born with specific talents that can't they just can't be duplicated.
Speaker 1:And I think the same is true of leadership. You know, I think of the Colin Powell's of the world and how he had such a tremendous impact on people, whether it was someone that he had just met or people who had known him, you know, over the years, whether you know, in military or in other areas of public service, and I do think that there are just certain qualities that people embody that can't be taught, they just come natural to them. I do think that you can study, you know best practices and leadership, and get coached, of course, or get mentored in terms of how to be a better leader, but I do think, at the end of the day, there are just natural skills and abilities and talents that some of us are blessed with, that just come easy to us, whereas others, you know, may have to pick up a book or learn and study because it doesn't come as natural to them, yeah, I agree with you.
Speaker 2:First off, you know my family lived in Chicago during the three Pete years, so oh well then you know my family lived in Chicago during the three-peat years.
Speaker 1:So oh well then you know I get you, I lived it I know, and you and I both got to see Colin Powell in action.
Speaker 2:But as you were talking about Michael Jordan, what I thought about was did Michael Jordan have other skills that he was able to leverage to become a great basketball player? Right, it is him. Not making the team in high school and him maybe being a little obsessive about that or super competitive, or just becoming hyper-focused on that issue made him put in the work and have the discipline and study the craft and stay determined and never forget. Right, even in his Hall of Fame speech, he mentions the person who made the team in high school instead of him. He invited that person to sit in the front row, if I remember the story correctly People can correct me in the comments if I'm wrong but he invited the person I can't remember the guy's name to his Hall of Fame acceptance. And that guy's sitting there thinking, oh, we've been Hall of Fame acceptance. And that guy's sitting there thinking, oh, we've been friends since high school. And Michael Jordan's like it's that dude right there that row, like he's the reason I'm here, because I stayed ready.
Speaker 2:I never forgot, and when I think about you know certainly, what I observed with Colin Powell it's you know and I'm you know I'd have to go back and read his books and people who know him better. So this is just me observing him as an entry-level employee. What stood out to me was that he was deliberative. He seemed, from what I could observe, open to. He didn't have to be the smartest person in the room. He was open to innovation and creativity and he seemed to know how to push people to be their best.
Speaker 2:It's those skills that they somehow hone, those natural skills that they're somehow able to leverage in their professional life. You know, like what you just said, where I have always been able to just connect with people throughout my life, combined with I, was always the person who was raising my hand in class and saying like I want to be the line leader, I want to be the hall monitor, I want to be the bus monitor, to the point where teachers were like can you stop raising your hand? You have someone else that can. So those things combined make it such that I'm not afraid to be the one to make the final decision. I like surrounding myself with really smart people. I like working in a collaborative way. I always have, yet I'm still able to see things from your perspective and things like that. That's just what your thought reminded me of. It's that they had these other skills as well.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think people, some people have the ability to tap into those like secondary skills that make their primary skills even greater and even more off the charts. It's funny, as you were talking about volunteering for extra tasks in school and you know wanting to help your teacher, or you know being the line leader, when do you think you knew that you had leadership?
Speaker 2:potential I think I've always known. I was in elementary school chomping at the bit to get into middle school so I could run for student council. Okay, I was like yo, ice cream social, that's lame, let me be in charge. I got ideas. I mean there's a period of my life from say like yo, ice cream social, that's lame, let me be in charge, I got ideas. I mean there's a period of my life from say, like maybe middle school through, like college, where I was always running for something. Some of my friends in college had a joke that my nickname was Program, because if there was something happening on campus at any given moment, my name was on the program. Like you're doing something that sounds fun, let's go, let's go. Can I help you? Can I roll up my sleeves? Can I? Can I mobilize people for you? Can I call people to action? It's not that I must be in the spotlight.
Speaker 1:You're not trying to hog the spotlight, no no, you just want to contribute.
Speaker 2:I just genuinely want to contribute. So how did that play well for me In? A lot of my work, particularly early in my career, was focused around messaging and communications. I love getting in front of an audience. You need me to make a speech. You need me to make a speech.
Speaker 2:That's like a really difficult policy issue that no one wants to talk about. Happy to do it. Need me to do it in another language? Let's go Like you know, like need me to talk to kids today, but senior legislators tomorrow.
Speaker 2:I'm on it when you bridge all of this. I love people, I love talking, I love rolling up my sleeves, I love doing the difficult things. Those things all have coalesced and so when it's time to lead, it's like we've got to have a town hall and explain to folks that there's going to be layoffs. I don't relish the opportunity, but I'm ready for it. Yeah Right, we have to do whatever the difficult stuff.
Speaker 2:I've now had enough experience and I read a long time ago that people who are experts at something have many, many, many hours of practice and I don't remember the number if it's 15,000 hours or 20,000 hours of experience in something. And so you take Serena. Like I can't go out there and play tennis against Serena because she, just since she was a child, has been building up those hours of practice. Since I was a child, I was building up those hours of practice and leadership. I was making mistakes. I was building up those hours of practice and leadership. I was making mistakes, I was learning, I was observing, because I was naturally gravitated to this. It's not that you can't learn those things I learn all the time about leadership and talking to people and reading things, et cetera but there are certain skills that we've all honed since we were young that we can use in this space.
Speaker 1:That's so true. Like what you just said, I've never thought about it in that way when it comes to just building the leadership chops, like how has your childhood influenced the path that you've taken to get to where you are right now? And you're absolutely right. Like I did a lot of the same things that you did. I volunteered to be student council president. You know if there were community service projects that the school you know was sponsoring and they needed volunteers or someone to lead an initiative, you know I was raising my hand. You know if there were after school activities for, you know, math enrichment. I remember doing like math problems with one of the math teachers who just loved math so much and wanted his students to participate in these math competitions and most people were like you know I don't have time for that and I was like, okay, this sounds cool, like I'll do it, sign me up.
Speaker 1:Or the spelling bee you know I was signing up for the spelling bee. You're right, it's like building blocks towards roles that naturally develop leadership skills along the way, that we've just been drawn to those types of opportunities. And you're right, it did start young, in elementary school and middle school, and it just progressed through high school and college where I continued, you know, to do the same things, to continue to raise my hand for initiatives that other people shied away from. Or, you know, I would just kind of take risks in leading projects, even group projects, and most people, you know, hate group projects.
Speaker 1:In college. It's like someone's always slacking, someone is always not pulling their weight, and I would just be the one to be like, ok, we're going to pull it together because I'm trying to get an A, I'm trying to make sure you know that that I'm, I'm tight, and so if I have to bring people along, we're going to do. Right, that's what we're going to do. I'm not going to, you know, cry and and fuss and cut. Well, there may have been a few, you know, moments where I was like, all right, you need to get your stuff together, but at the end of the day, I was always focused on the goal.
Speaker 2:And that's why self-awareness is so critical when you're in a leadership role, because, especially when you haven't had a lot of experience Like I've seen, people just like dropped into a senior role and they haven't they haven't managed anything in their life, and so you really need to have the self-awareness to know, like, what are my actual skills, where do I have deficits, how can I surround myself with people who can fill these deficits, and how can I start to learn the lessons or at least be aware of where I need to be? So, for example, if you haven't been forced to be a leader and make lots of little and consequential decisions throughout your career, and then, all of a sudden, you're in charge and somebody comes to you and says can you sign this thing? It's worth millions of dollars if we mess up your jobs on the line and everybody's going to get fired, right.
Speaker 2:You're like whoa whoa, there's a lot, and so you need to know that about yourself, right, and to know what am I really concerned about here? I don't know you, and if you know how to count right, I don't know. I have the lawyers looked at this Like is this normal, like some reasonable things, but at some point you got to know what your weaknesses are, fill those and then you got to make the decision. I mean, that's just one example, but this idea that when you are put into situations where you haven't had the practice, you need to be clear on the inventory of your genius what is not in the inventory, so you can start working on it and get the right people in the room 100%.
Speaker 2:I really appreciated this conversation about tapping into your genius and you know whether leadership can be learned or not and how to realize what are the breadcrumbs that have been dropped over the years that can lead you down a path of becoming a great leader. This is something that one can really sit with and tapping into and recognizing your own genius. But, as a leader, how are you helping the people on your team find and tap into their genius as well? How are you lifting others?
Speaker 1:Yes, that is the critical piece. Yeah, as we've said many times, it's not just about you and your potential, but what are you doing to bring others along and to make the team better and greater?
Speaker 2:Well, I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to listen. I hope that you're watching us on YouTube. If you're not, you're missing out. It's a party over here, so please find us on YouTube at the Leadership Tea Podcast, obviously, if you're listening to us on Apple, spotify or wherever you get your podcasts, we're really thankful for you and thankful for all of our listeners. Please leave us feedback in the comments.
Speaker 2:We really do read all of the comments and we try to be as responsive as possible and subscribe. We would love that. It lets us know that what we're providing and what we're giving you is useful and you're able to use it in your everyday work and what you're doing and achieving for your team. You can always find more about us and the challenge and all the things that we're doing on StirringSuccesscom. Go there, take a look at the information about the Shoot your Shot Challenge, download the pledge, and there's also some goodies in that download too, like a couple of amazing playlists. I have certainly been enjoying the time to curate. I mean, I really have in the car seriously, same same.
Speaker 1:I listened to the playlist this morning on my morning walk, like for real.
Speaker 2:I'm all over it, so I want that for you. If you need to be motivated, we have two playlists one that's just crunk that's 30 90s of me, but it is it's crunk and one that is gospel. So, whatever it is you need, we got you. We're thankful for you and we're just glad that you came to join us today, where we are sipping wisdom and stirring success.
